Scary Women
Words: Joseph Abbott
Music: “Pretty Women” from “Sweeney Todd,” Stephen Sondheim
Inspired by the webcomic “Narbonic” by Shaenon Garrity
Scary women
Holding weapons
Spiking coffee
Plotting
Scary women
Scary women
Are a terror
Scary women
Sitting at a console or
Lurking in a lair
Something in them chills the air
Scary women
Planting implants
Stay within you
Probing
Stay forever
Laughing madly
Scary women
Scary women
Blowing up their rivals or
Cloning you for spare
Even when you leave
You’d best beware
They’re there
Ah! Scary women, at their beakers
In their labcoats
Gene-rewriting
Power-lusting
Launcher-aiming
How they make a man scream!
Proof you’re mad too, as you’re staying
What we do for scary women
Scary women!
Scary women!
Scary women —
(Would you like a breath mint?)